Originally Posted at The Beautiful You Project
Hello My Beauty,
So, here is a list of things I am giving myself a pass on, freedom from the box of: Should haves ~ Need to’s ~ You’re supposed to ~ It says to ~ The rules clearly state ~ But I promised/gave my word/said ‘yes’ to….
I have always made sure my son knows he can always change his mind. I make a point to tell my students this too. Why? Because at some point in my young adult life, I began to believe that once I signed up for something, I had to do it forever more. That I wasn’t allowed to change my mind.
No one told me this. This was just something I intuitively understood. But why? I haven’t actually gotten to the bottom of that one yet, but it doesn’t really matter ‘why.’ What matters is that I now understand I am abso-fucking-lutley ALLOWED to change my mind for no other reason than I choose to.
And, oh, the freedom in that permission slip is astounding. So, check ~ I CAN change my mind.
What about those tags that say ‘do not remove?’ All my towels, and my linens, and my hair dryer/appliances STILL have their tags on them. You know the ones I’m talking about. The ones that WARN you to leave them be, that state they are to, “STAY ON FOR YOUR OWN PROTECTION.” Ugh!
Here’s to the freedom of giving myself permission to cut the suckers OFF! Can I just say, not having to mess with the tag that got in my way, every damn day, while drying my hair has been ridiculously liberating!
And what about every time I use a restroom…. Well, alllmost every time, I am the lucky winner who gets the toilet paper roll with a single sheet left. It’s gotten to the point where I’ve lost it completely with my students, shaking the empty toilet paper roll at them, demanding, “Do you KNOW how to change an empty roll of toilet paper?” And then pointedly showing them how to do so, all the while emphasizing that doing something so SIMPLE is a kindness they do for the person who uses the restroom after them…. Do you think this fit changed anything? Nope.
I still, more often than not, change the toilet paper roll, daily. Now, we have a busy learning center and A LOT of students use the restroom. So of course, the toilet paper roll is going to need to be changed OFTEN. But when this happens to me at a local restaurant we frequent, when it happens in the airplane’s restroom at 35,000 feet, when it happens at the chiropractic office, the grocery store, the…. You get my point.
To say I was annoyed, is putting things mildly. But really, when something like this happens again and again… and again, it is TIME to take notice because the Universe is CLEARLY sending you/me a message.
The Borg (yes, I love Star Trek) had a saying, “Resistance is futile.” And you can see how well resistance served me. So, now I laugh. I embrace, instead of resist. Freedom from my own annoyance! Whoop! Whoop!
How about leaving the dirty dishes in the sink so I can spend more of my sacred time on my writing. Permission to clean up the mess later.
I’m still working on that one, but I have come to understand I need my bed to be made and my kitchen to be in order, in order to focus on my craft. Go figure, I have NO problem what-so-ever NOT folding and putting away our clean clothes. Permission to accept and work with my idiosyncrasies = freedom.
The point of all of this is to remind myself, and to remind YOU too, My Beauty, that:
Permission to let go of the box we put ourselves in, is one of the most liberating gifts we can give ourselves.
I don’t care if it’s something as profound a decision as choosing to get divorced or if it’s something as ridiculous as cutting the damn tags off. Permission is permission. And after all, we are the only ones who can give ourselves that kind of freedom.
So what are you/we waiting for? My scissors are ready! How about yours?
Blessings always and in all ways,
Post Script One: Permission carried over to cutting the tags off my shirts, the tags that have been their for years…. Oh, the liberation! Snip, snip and I’m giggling all the way.
Post Script Two: Just in case you thought the toilet paper roll story ended…. The very day I wrote this blog, I used the restroom at our yoga studio and had to change the toilet paper roll…. Here’s to embracing and laughing, and the Universe and ME getting a kick out of both.